Okay, this may erk some of you, but I don't care. I have to say it! Call it the gift of Mercy. Call it the ability to sympathize (whether you think the person deserves it or not). Call it stupid. Whatever.
I am so tired of everyone picking on this poor woman! The tabloid papers at the grocery store: "Caring Mom or Monster!" "House is a mess!" I don't care who you are or whether or not you are married, if you have 6 kids under 7 - much less just gave birth a month ago - YOUR HOUSE WILL BE A MESS! because when you do clean it, you have 12 little hands behind you taking it all out again! What is America's problem! There are so many logs coming out of so many eyes as they criticize this woman.
I know, I know: single, student, low income... but you know what, change the income & America would still have an issue with her. If she was a millionaire she would still be labeled as unstable. If she was married, on the other hand, they would turn it into a cable show & we would all tune in!
The real problem most of America has with her is not her income but her choice to be a single mom on purpose. Think about it: So many in the last 30+ years have been encouraging single women to abort their babies as "unplanned" and therefore "unwanted" and a "burden" that will ruin the rest of your life. Here we have, not just a single mom, but a mom who went through IVF as a single, purposefully getting pregnant, purposefully taking upon herself the "shame" of being an unwed mother, still going to school, still wanting the children instead of being "held back" by them. It smashes the pro-abortion attitude that women who are single and get pregnant should do themselves & the baby (as if) a favor & "get rid of it." That single women who get pregnant jeprodize theirown & their child's future. And, that a single woman who gets pregnant has done so by "mistake" or has somekind of mental illness that causes her to get pregnant on purpose, either to control the father in some way, or to fill a love void.
Don't get me wrong. I strongly believe that every child needs both a mother & father figure, and that every child deserves a mom & dad who love and are commited to each other in marriage. I also feel that she would have done well to adopt. But, seeing as her decision was already made, why cannot people step back, see her need, and be a help (some have) instead of being a henderance and a critic. As my dad would say, "If you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem."
We have allowed ourselves be convienced that having (much less "wanting") a large family is a ludicous and out of date (not to mention "out of your right mind") idea. "Why would anyone, especially a single woman, want to have so many children?" We have been told that children are a burden and an abuse on our own bodies and lives, that people with such families are either fundamentally religious or mentally and intelligently incompitent (or all of the above), and that it is enviromentally irresponsible to burden the world and its resources with such reproduction. Unfortunately we have believed it, and our attitude toward this woman's choices shows it.
America's media is so base and hurtfull. It has become Rome's "Bread & Circus" in so many ways. "Let's bash people down and make a specticle of them! Come on! It will be fun and we'll get good ratings! Besides, she got herself into this, she deserves it! Don't forget the part about how it will effect us all financially! If you show people how it will hit them in the pocket we will get a better, and more entertaining, rise out of everyone!" Shame on any one of us who is getting caught up in the tearing down of this woman, this mother, who is at least an example of a single mom who actually wants children and is willing to go through so much for them. In this sadly pro-abortion society where our own president signs bills to use government dollars* to kill other country's kids and punish our own doctors and nurses who refuse to do so, the least we can do - even though we disagree with her way of going about the whole thing - is to support a woman who knows the joy and blessing that children are and welcomes new life.
*If we are going to blame & complain about our tax dollars going to support irresponsible parents, let it be against those "parents" who are spending our taxes to pay to leagally kill their children, not against those who are actually taking care of their babies, no matter how many.
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In order to get my mind off of reality I will reply to your blog, lol...really i love your other posts soooo much and should focus on those, but I can't resist this one.
ReplyDeleteAlyssa, you started out on one topic and ended up focusing on much bigger matters which have no bearing to octomom.
I am trying to think of an analogy but the only thing I can come up with is a teenager really wanting an iPhone...so he goes out and buys the phone and of course it isn't cheap! Then he has to get the plan that allows him to access the internet, unlimited texted and the tv app is really cool. He goes home and realizes he needs some cool ringtones and some more apps and games. Oh, did I mention he is only 16 and has no job and his mom has a landline. lol but the phone is so much fun! Of course the first bill comes and it is way more than he can pay and mom foots the first bill bc she helped him get the contract. Well mom keeps paying the bill and the boy never really gets it. He reallt should have gotten a prepaid phone that had unlimited texting, kept him connected to friends and a phone he WAS ABLE TO AFFORD.
You focused on her not being married, so what?! You were right that a single mom can raise children. But she has to think about the reality of her life, income, what she will be able to give of her time etc. I would give octomom just as much flack if she was married because they still couldn't afford to raise 14 children.
And abortion almost seemed like a loose association your way of letting out your anger about the topic. Abortion is awful, it is sad but really has no bearing on octomom except that once she got implanted and found out that all 8 babies took she made the right decision to KEEP the babies alive...although some would argue because of all the risks not only to her but also the babies. These children may all have major health, emotional and devolpmental issues as they mature.
And I so truly believe that God did not intend for her to have all these children, this was not a gift from God but from SCIENCE. Possibly she could have adopted first. But even once she found out she was having 8 more babies she could have thought about adopting out...how many infertile moms would have loved to raise a baby of their own?
But we can only live within our means, God doesn't want for us to be greedy or to spend money we do not have. A $500,000 house (aapparently because she gave Dr. Phil a few interviews), $135,000 per month for nannies? So many parents (and single moms) would love to have more children but realize that they have finincial limitation, time restraints...that they simply cannot afford to do so.
So I know we could both go on and on...and I think I know some of what you are thinking. But octomom is not a responsible parent and I don't think she thinks like you do. I don't believe that her children will grow in Christ and I do not believe that they will get the loving attention you give to Seja,Sophhie, Pierce and Mica.
I read a this..."So let's see, you (octomom) were pissed that your parents gave you no siblings and now your children are pissed that you gave them a million siblings."
Sounds totally healthy!